


flowers of flesh and bone

by moriphyte



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Past Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-12 13:25:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11162763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moriphyte/pseuds/moriphyte
Summary: flesh is a flowerit grows on boneyou think that's kind of beautiful





	flowers of flesh and bone

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this while very high in the car on the way to Wendy's to get fries and a milkshake. It's just some more stupid shit of recovering from trauma based on my life :/

 

Flesh is a flower that grows on bone  
Your body is a garden of flesh  
You learned this the hard way  
A blade to the body, cutting a mark in the flesh that would stay there as a scar to remind you of the pain for the rest of your life  
You hate your scars  
But there they're there  
So you just have to deal with them  
You know you're not the only one with scars, a lot of you have them, the only difference with yours is that you didn't get all of them from your time in the game  
Terezi has scars, pale lines on the skin of her arms, and others on her body that she doesn't like to talk about, not even with you  
From what you gather from your late night talks over a cup of something warm, she got most of them from Gamzee  
You hate that fucker  
You could never really hate your Bro, he hurt you and it fucking sucks but you just can't bring yourself to hate him  
With Gamzee it's different  
He hurt one of the people you love most in this shitty ass world  
He broke her down  
You still remember Karkat calling you when he found Terezi passed out on the floor  
You remember how it felt to see her there, curled up in her underwear, covered in bruises, crying over it all  
It hurt to see her like that, but the girl you used to know is slowly coming back with time, but she'll never be the same, that you know all of well  
When neither of you can sleep from nightmares you sit together and talk, drinking coffee or tea and sharing a cigarette out on the fire escape as you watch the hazy sky of your new home  
It's nice here and for the first time in your life you feel safe  
Everyone is healing in their own way  
Rose and Roxy haven't touched alcohol in the year you've been here  
They both took up smoking, but then again so did most of you  
Cigarettes aren't good for your health, but it helps, fuck your health after everything you've been through  
You all have your own ways to cope  
And things are healing, slowly  
  
You sit on the couch in the common room, legs crossed on the coffee table that's covered in everything from dirty cups to cigarette ash, eating chips and watching Roxy kicking John's ass at Mario Kart  
"Fuck yeah that's how you do it!" Roxy cheers, dropping her pink controller and throwing her hands up in the air as Princess Peach does the same on the tv screen  
John sighs, watching a defeated Mario on screen, "god fucking dammit"  
"You're getting your ass kicked dude" you comment, taking a chip from the bag in your lap and shoving it in your mouth  
He flips you off, "fuck this, I'm done"  
"Aw why, its funny to watch you loose" Terezi says from the other side of the couch, reaching over your lap to take the bag of chips  
He glares at her, "you just find every negative thing that happens to me funny"  
"Yup!" She says, giving him a huge grin and shoving a handful of chips in her mouth  
"Fuck you" he says  
She grins, "you wish"  
John goes red and Roxy laughs, "lol, wonk"  
He pouts at her, "you're supposed to be on my side" he whines  
Roxy laughs again, "Johnny, I love you, but watching you get messed with is funny"  
"It is pretty fuckin funny, dude" you say, taking the chips back from Terezi  
"Besides, you fuck with us all the time with your pranks, this is what you get" Terezi says  
John groans, "fuck you guys"  
Terezi's laugh carries through the whole room

After a dinner of mac and cheese and pizza pockets you gather in the common room to watch movies  
It's Roxy's turn to choose the movie, and she makes you all watch The To Do List which you don't have a problem with, that movie is fuckin funny  
After the movie ends people start getting up to go to bed.  
Dirk lifts a sleeping (and snoring) Roxy off her place on the floor and says goodnight as he carries her to the room she shares with Jane and Callie  
"I think we will be retiring as well" Rose says  
"God what are you old people?" You ask  
She gives a smile of black lipstick she still hasn't taken off, "we like to get our sleep, David, you should too"  
You shrug, "nah"  
After Rose and Kanaya go to their room Vriska pushes herself up and stretches we arms above her head, cracking her back loudly  
"Well, I'm going to bed, later losers" she says, giving you all a grin and a wave before spinning on her heel and walking down the hall to the room she shares with Terezi  
"I'm gonna go too" John says, leaning over to shake Karkat awake where he had fallen asleep leaning against the couch  
Karkat groans, "fuck...what?"  
"The movies over" John says  
Karkat squints and rubs his eyes, "yeah, okay, whatever"  
You watch your best friend and your boyfriend make their way down the hall and disappear into the bedroom you all share  
That just leaves you and Terezi

"You going to bed?" She asks from beside you  
You shrug, "dunno, I'm not really tired"  
"That's a lie Dave, you're always tired"  
"I had five cups of coffee today" you say  
She shrugs, "whatever, you wanna smoke?"  
You nod, "hell yeah"

  
You climb through the window and out onto the rusted fire escape, taking a seat on the cold metal  
Terezi plops down beside you and pulls out a cigarette, "you got a light?"  
"How is that even a question?" you say, pulling a cherry lighter from your pocket  
She grins, "I love that one"  
You hand her the lighter and she puts the cigarette to her lips and strikes the lighter, holding the flame to the end until it lights  
She closes her eyes (not that it makes much of a difference) and takes in a breath, blowing the smoke out into the warm summer night air  
She smiles and hands you the cigarette, "your turn"  
You do that for a while, just sit in silence and pass the cigarette back and forth  
As she smokes beside you you look out over the city, watching the sky  
You made this  
Technically you're a god, but you've never really thought of it that way  
You all mostly just use your powers to do every day things, or just to fuck with each other  
"Hey coolkid you there?" Terezi asks from beside you, peering up at you with her solid red eyes, the cigarette held out to you between her fingers  
"Oh, uh, yeah" you say, taking the cigarette from her  
You go back to easy silence  
"Do you think it gets better?" She asks as she takes the cigarette you offer her, blind eyes on the sky  
You shrug, "damn Tez, fuck if I know, I'm fucked up"  
She laughs and shakes her head, "yeah, me too"  
"Everybody's fucked up" you say, taking the cigarette from her hand, "some more than others"  
She smiles sadly, "yeah, what I wouldn't give to be less fucked up"  
You laugh, "hey, you got me, I'm fucked up as hell, and so is everyone else, we all are, you're not alone"  
"Yeah but they hold it together most of the time...I'm a mess" she says, looking down  
"Tez last week I had a panic attack when Nepeta hugged me from behind" you say  
She frowns, "yeah but everyone else..."  
"Dude, everyone does it, John spent all of last week in our room sleeping, Rose smoked a pack of cigarettes a day, Dirk's hardly slept at all"  
She shrugs, "I guess, I just feel like...I don't want to be like this"  
"I know, it fuckin sucks, but it's how it is"  
"Yeah, I know that" she says  
"But to answer your question, I think it probably gets better"  
She takes the cigarette you offer her, which is almost burnt down to the filter, and inhales  
She breaths the smoke into the air and flicks the cigarette but over the fire escape, "yeah, I guess you're right"  
"I'm always right" you say  
She grins, "shut up"  
She leans over, resting her head on your shoulder as you both watch the sky turn dark

You sit like that until the sun comes up and you hear the noise of Kanaya making breakfast in the kitchen  
Terezi has fallen asleep against you and you carry her inside and into her room, setting her gently on her colorful scalemate covered bed  
You hear a groan from the other side of the room and turn to see Vriska sitting up, her hair a mess  
"What time is it?" She asks  
"5:30" you say  
She squints at you, "what the fuck are you doing in here then, go the fuck to sleep"  
"I was just bringing Terezi in" you say  
She looks over at where Terezi lays curled on her bed and back at you, "okay, whatever just...get the fuck out of here already"  
"Good morning to you miss sunshine" you say  
She throws a pillow at you

"Oh, good morning Dave" Kanaya says to you from her place at the stove  
"Morning Kan, what you makin?" You ask  
"I was just making eggs with vegetables if you want any" she says  
"Are they scrambled?" You ask  
"I wouldn't say so, no"  
You grin, "then fuck yeah"

After shoving a shit load of eggs in you you get up from the counter and stretch, "you need help with dishes?"  
She shakes her head, "no I think I can handle it but thank you for offering"  
"No prob. Alright, ima go to bed then, thanks for the eggs"  
She gives you a smile, "you are very welcome Dave"  
Your room is dark ask you slip inside  
The shitty old fan in the window is humming and you glance over at Karkat where he lays curled up on his bed  
You smile and walk over to him, leaning down to give him a light kiss on the forehead before walking over to your own bed and slipping under the covers  
You close your eyes and to the darkness and the sound of the fan, you fall asleep


End file.
